One day, it’ll be totally retro and boss and people in Brooklyn and Germantown will be wearing Rhinos jerseys, but not in 2015. They have not updated their crest, name, or colors since that time. The Rhinos are one of the oldest teams in the USL, founded in 1996. Rochester is apparently known as the World’s Image Center for some reason, and it was also once known as the Flour City, for an equally obscure reason that I will not look up. People forget that there’s about 50,000 square miles of land called New York that isn’t a part of NYC. Looking at the USL Eastern Conference table, you’ll see that just underneath the white-hot Charleston Battery is our next opponent from New York. Why not start a couple days even earlier and watch the big match with us at 7:30 at Slugger Field? You won’t really be working at all over the next two weeks anyway.
The Derby Festival is getting ready to kick off. In all seriousness, big match coming up tomorrow for Elsie. By Taylor Sorrels ( I read Louisville City’s next opponent’s name in full, all I can think of is a mid-1930’s dust bowl carnival barker in a boater hat and striped shirt yelling STEP RIGHT UP! THURSDAY THURSDAY THURSDAY!!!1! COME ONE COME ALL TO SEE THE LASCIVIOUS LADS FROM LOUISVILLE CITY QUELL THE RAVENOUS, RESPLENDENT ROCHESTER RAGING RAMPAGING RHINOCEROSES! ALLITERATION IS OUR FRIEND!
